Rescue Humor "the funny side of Police, Firefighters and Paramedics" is all about the crazy things that Police Officers, Firefighters and Paramedics run into on duty. Even if you are not a police officer, firefighter or EMT we welcome you.
Any one with something to add send it to rescuehumor @ gmail.com
BENIGN................WHAT YOU BE AFTER YOU BE EIGHT
ARTERY...............THE STUDY OF PAINTINGS
BACTERIA............BACK DOOR TO CAFETERIA.
BARIUM................WHAT YOU DO WITH A PERSON WHEN HE DIES.
CESAREAN SECTION........... A NEIGHBORHOOD IN ROME.
CATscan................SEARCHING FOR YOUR KITTY.
CAUTERIZE............MADE EYE CONTACT WITH HER.
COMA....................A PUNCTUATION MARK
D&C.....................WHERE BILL CLINTON LIVES
DILATE.................TO LIVE LONG.
ENEMA................NOT A FRIEND
FESTER...............QUICKER THAN SOMEONE ELSE
FIBULA................A SMALL LIE
GENITAL..............NON-JEWISH PERSON
G.I. SERIES..........WORLD SERIES OF MILITARY BASEBALL
HANGNAIL............WHERE YOU PUT YOUR COAT IN THE CLOSET
IMPOTENT............DISTINGUISHED, WELL KNOWN
MEDICAL STAFF.... A DOCTOR'S CANE
MORBID..................A HIGHER OFFER THAN I BID
NITRATES..............CHEAPER THAN DAY RATES
NODE....................I KNEW IT
PAP SMEAR...........A FATHERHOOD TEST
PELVIS...................SECOND COUSIN TO ELVIS
POST OPERATIVE....A LETTER CARRIER
RECOVERY ROOM......A PLACE TO DO UPHOLSTERY
RECTUM....................RIGHT NEAR KILLED HIM
SEIZURE....................ROMAN EMPEROR
TERMINAL ILLNESS.....GETTING SICK AT THE AIRPORT
TUMOR......................MORE THAN ONE
URINE.....................OPPOSITE OF YOU'RE OUT
VARICOSE.............NEARBY
Observations of a ridealong...
1. Ignore patients as much as possible- I don't know you, you don't know me, but tell me if you have any pain.
2. The EMT always gets shafted, if you listen closely you can hear the sound of it. It sounds like an phone ringing.
3. Chinese food shall always be disposed of out the window while driving code 3 to a BS call in another county.
4. There are times when seatbelts aren't just optional equipment.
5. You're not going fast till the speedometer doesn't register anymore.
6. Get in, sit down, shut up!
7. The day's not over till the late job comes in (see #3)
8. The Med control option always used: Drive faster!
9. EMS personnel never eat, as soon as they do the EMT is inevitably shafted!
10. It is only required that any 2 wheels of the ambulance ever touch the ground while driving.